Wednesday, April 1, 2009

"But I saw it on A Current Affair, so it must be true!"

Um.. more like I saw it on A Current Affair, so I'm pretty sure it's bullshit. A lovely customer tries to return a fuggly pair of shoes to me. The conversation goes something like this:

Stupid customer: I'd like to return these.
Bored salesperson: We don't refund, but I can give you a gift certificate.
Irritating customer: No, I want my money back.
Apathetic salesperson: What's wrong with them. Besides being hideous.
Annoying customer: I don't like them.
Unconcerned salesdrone: But they match your hideousness. We don't refund non-faulty items.
Whiny customer: But you can't say that!
Fed up salesperson: I just did.
Know-it-all: I'm pretty sure it's illegal to tell me you can't give me a refund.
Big-ball-of-meh: Oh, really.
Bothersome customer: Yes. I saw it on A Current Affair. So it must be true.
Dead-panned salesperson: Listen, lady. I've worked in retail for almost a decade. I ain't gotta give you anything unless it's broke. A'ight?
Obtuse person: But I saw it on the TV! A Current Affair did a story on it!

It astounds me that people believe what they see on the television when most of it is make-believe. Even more so when they admit it. Even more amazing is the fact that this marvellous example of intelligence hasn't been run over by a bus... yet.

Epilogue: Said customer was given a gift certificate and the website address for Consumer Affairs Victoria. A Current Affair continues to create accurate and riveting news pieces. This author is now married to a rockstar and lives in a mansion with five pet iguanas.


Anonymous said...

OMG! Was I your customer??!!