Saturday, March 27, 2010

An open letter to Metro(sexual)

Dearest Metro,

I love you, and you've taken me places and helped me go where I want to go... but I think it's over. I need someone who doesn't fuck me over all the time. Someone who'll be where they say they are, and when they say they will. Someone who won't lie to me about what you are. I hate how you hide things from me. I need someone who's happy to see me first thing Monday morning and won't dump me in the middle of nowhere (Platform 14, if you know what I mean). You're never there when I need someone to help me at 1am in the morning. Actually, now that I think about it you're never there, regardless of the time. I need someone who'll validate my tickets AND me.

I know I always talk about my ex, but seriously I'd take Connex back any day. At least he gave me ice cream when he fucked up! If this is what being in a relationship is about, then I'm on the first limited express train out of here!

Yours truly (and please never contact me again),
Daily commuter

Amazing photo of Metro's "information screen". Thanks for all the detailed information.

Technically this was on a tram... but Metro and Yarra Trams can both take it up the arse.

Seriously, you'd think with the Internet and modern computer systems that they would somehow be able to correlate the information about the train so that the people on the train, the people on the platform, the train driver and whoever controls the network has the same information. But you know, just because every other city in the world has a public transport system that can, that doesn't mean that we should expect it.