Thursday, August 5, 2010

Shawty Hawty

I'm five foot three. I'm not short. I'm fun-sized.

People frequently make fun of my height (being teased seems to be a common theme with me, being a short, Asian teetotaller who can't drive for shit - I like to think it is a sign of affection). I have to tiptoe to properly reach some of the clothes racks at work. I have to slide the car seat way forward to reach the pedals. Lots of my "dresses" are actually long tops.

Pay me out all you want. Because you know what? I can date short men and tall men. If it's hot, I can just hide in the cool shade behind a tall friend. And I can see the snot ball dangling from your nostrils as you speak. You may want a tissue, my friend.